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Share your favorite jokes:18325

being an ass and being a clown are two very different things. HAmistoso private msg quote post Address this user
Batman: “Alfred, why is the batremote for the batTV not working?”
Alfred: “Have you changed the batteries, sir?”
Batman: “What are eries?”
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Collector SixgunSamurai private msg quote post Address this user
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?

Elephino.
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being an ass and being a clown are two very different things. HAmistoso private msg quote post Address this user
Why is Batman terrible in the sack?

Because he needs to use gadgets.
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being an ass and being a clown are two very different things. HAmistoso private msg quote post Address this user
What happens when Batman sees Catwoman?

The Dark Knight Rises.
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The apple sauce and pudding were the best part... Bronte private msg quote post Address this user
When Batman is investigating a crime, the most likely explanation is that the Joker did it.

That’s Arkham’s Razor.
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being an ass and being a clown are two very different things. HAmistoso private msg quote post Address this user
What did the Joker say when he heard that he hadn't won the award for the best villain?

"Oh boy, you must be Joaquin!"
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I don't want to brag, but cashiers are always checking me out. power_struggle55 private msg quote post Address this user
I went to a zoo. It only had one dog. It was a Shih Tzu
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No rust here... Nearmint67 private msg quote post Address this user
What’s Batman’s favorite part of a joke? The punchline.
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No rust here... Nearmint67 private msg quote post Address this user
What did the loaf of bread say to Batman? “Rye so serious?”
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No rust here... Nearmint67 private msg quote post Address this user
What do you call an injured Batman? Bruised Wayne.
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No rust here... Nearmint67 private msg quote post Address this user
What does Batgirl wear to the superhero ball? Her Dark Knight gown.
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No rust here... Nearmint67 private msg quote post Address this user
Why does Batman suck at card games? He always gets The Joker.
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No rust here... Nearmint67 private msg quote post Address this user
What is Bruce Wayne’s favorite baseball position? Bat boy.
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No rust here... Nearmint67 private msg quote post Address this user
What did Bruce Wayne’s mom put over his crib? A bat mobile.
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being an ass and being a clown are two very different things. HAmistoso private msg quote post Address this user
Knock, Knock...
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Collector doog private msg quote post Address this user
A panda bear spent some time with a hooker, then headed for the door. The hooker said “wait a minute you forgot something “ the panda bear said “no I didn’t, see you”
The hooker replied “look up hooker in this hotel dictionary; Hooker: “has sex for money”.
The panda bear says “Look up panda bear”. The hooker does; Panda Bear; “Eats shoots and leaves”
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Suck it up, buttercup!! KatKomics private msg quote post Address this user
What did the donkey say when he coughed??

You'll have to excuse me... I'm a little horse
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being an ass and being a clown are two very different things. HAmistoso private msg quote post Address this user
Quote:
Originally Posted by doog
A panda bear spent some time with a hooker, then headed for the door. The hooker said “wait a minute you forgot something “ the panda bear said “no I didn’t, see you”
The hooker replied “look up hooker in this hotel dictionary; Hooker: “has sex for money”.
The panda bear says “Look up panda bear”. The hooker does; Panda Bear; “Eats shoots and leaves”



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Suck it up, buttercup!! KatKomics private msg quote post Address this user
Did you read the reviews about the restaurant on the moon.... food was great but it had no atmosphere
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Collector Zombiebigfoot private msg quote post Address this user
What do you call a dog that does magic tricks? A lab-ra-ca-dab-rador!
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Collector Zombiebigfoot private msg quote post Address this user
Heard a story about a man who ate his pillow while sleeping one night. The next morning he woke up down in the dumps...
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No rust here... Nearmint67 private msg quote post Address this user
So a guy was walking down the street kicking a can. Asked him, "whatcha doing".
He said, moving......
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Collector Cerebus3000 private msg quote post Address this user
There was a man who had such violently loud flatulence that his wife would often say "one day you're going to fart your guts out". One Thanksgiving while preparing the Turkey in the early morning, his wife decided to prank her husband. She took the turkey giblets, sneaked into the bedroom, and placed the giblets down the back of her soundly sleeping husband's pajamas. Just as she was exiting the bedroom her husband passed gas with such force it woke him up. A moment later the wife heard her husband scream, and then watched him run to the bathroom in a panic. About twenty minutes later he exited the bathroom, pale as a ghost, sweating profusely and holding the index and middle finger of his right hand in the air. She was still stifling a giggle when her husband said "You were right honey. I did fart my guts out, but by the grace of God and these two fingers, I got them all back in again."
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I don't want to brag, but cashiers are always checking me out. power_struggle55 private msg quote post Address this user
What is Mario's favorite type of pants?
Denim Denim Denim
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I don't want to brag, but cashiers are always checking me out. power_struggle55 private msg quote post Address this user
A Priest, a rabbit and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbit says "I think Im a typo"
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I don't want to brag, but cashiers are always checking me out. power_struggle55 private msg quote post Address this user
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
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being an ass and being a clown are two very different things. HAmistoso private msg quote post Address this user
Quote:
Originally Posted by power_struggle55
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?


I'm listening...
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It was a one trick pony show but always hilarious. GAC private msg quote post Address this user
Quote:
Originally Posted by WMorse
Quote:
Originally Posted by power_struggle55
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?


I'm listening...



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Suck it up, buttercup!! KatKomics private msg quote post Address this user
I was driving to the store and rear-ended the car in front of me.... the guy got out to look at the damage..and...well...he was a little person.
Anyway....he looked at the damage and said "I'm not happy".....so I asked him " which one are you?"
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Suck it up, buttercup!! KatKomics private msg quote post Address this user
for my Canadian peeps!! ( apologies to the bilangue )

What's the only thing wrong with French immersion?

They don't hold them under long enough
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